a pang of guilt.

woke up at 8p.m in shock.. with 9 miss calls and some messages. Overslept. Shit. Realised that i sld be coaching at np right now. It was e last trg be4 e competition starts. Answered e 10th call, had to make out e wrds sorry i overslept. Totally irresponsible, felt e disappointment in them. Had to tell them what i want them to practice on and when e call ended i text an apology sms. It was hard, starring blankly and all e things tat occured today came flowing into my still shocked mind.
I have had my piece of fun time throught e night then went to class totally unprepared, fallen asleep e moment i sat down, untill my fren came abt. Went home for a supposed 3 hrs nap but ended up with 6 screwed up big time. It was pointless rushing down to Np cuz they be done by then, din had e chance to make any amendments. To worsern it, all e players were down today with intention to prepare themselves for e games. I seriously dunno how to face them in wed, ashamed of myself not knowing my limits and responsibilities. Where a line sld be drawn somewhere, i thought i was handling well maybe this was a wake up call before all is too late to be realised. Well to say that i still have time dun sound at all convincing but hopefully its time i pick up e pieces and find e path i sld be taking. Stop acting like a kid and acting as my wishes tells.
I guess its not easy to understand how bad it felt, and i'm sorry to say that it felt worst when u guys said u understand. Like a heavy weight lying down on me. When it sounded okay it was totally not, as suggestions were made to improve conditions or reduce e feeling of guilt it seems so simple & easy but i knew deep inside as a matter of fact it was just excuses which i myself cant even acknowledge. But i still wanna say thanks for trying it was at least comforting and it did release me frm blaming myself.
Had a headache frm e lack of slp but i still dun feel like sleeping. Suddenly i just wondered when i think in other's shoes, i may pity and feel connection, try to help reduce it all but how can i possiblily fully know and feel exactly e same feeling.

Sorry for e disappointment

i've learnt a lesson a hard way.

I'm Really sorry, din know of anyway else to amend to this

or any better word to ease.